Jack & Avie’s Wedding at Spring Lake Manor, NJ

The perfect example of what’s really important on any wedding day.

To put it bluntly, Jack and Avie could have chosen to call off the wedding entirely.   Jack’s Mom passed away just two months before the wedding was to take place, and they got married quietly at her bedside so that she could be with them at that important moment.

Instead, they chose to go ahead with the celebration as planned, and although I’m sure it wasn’t the easiest decision, it was definitely the right one.   Jack’s Mom was there in spirit, without a doubt, and the entire day - from the church service through to the most incredible dance floor of any wedding I’ve ever been a part of – was an example of what happens when you put family, friendships and the love that ties you all together above anything else.    

I’m sure that losing Jack’s Mom gave them a stark reminder that in the end, the small details really aren’t that important.  Tropical Storm Melissa was raging outside the whole day (maybe more than a small detail), and rather than bemoan the weather, they embraced it.   Young nieces and nephews crowded the front row of the church and were anything but silent, and they embraced that, too.   Those same nieces and nephews were first on the dance floor, and I think the fun level was amped up a notch or two because of it.

An unexpected guest was treated with kindness, and the venue was asked to add a seat to one of the tables.  No fuss, no upset.  Just generosity and welcoming arms.  Kudos also to the wonderful people at the Spring Lake Manor, who made absolutely everyone feel at home.

My advice to couples is always to have the wedding you want and not the wedding someone else might want for you, but after spending time with Jack, Avie and their families, I might need to add this: sometimes your plans will go awry, whether in a big way or small, but if you simply focus on the real reason you’re there,  the joy will never be diminished.

Of course, I believe that a key element is also to have a photographer who makes people comfortable and doesn’t attempt to turn the day into a directed photoshoot.  That’s why documentary wedding photography is perfect for any wedding day – it allows the day to unfold without interruption, and celebrates every moment, from the planned to the completely unexpected.